Tuesday, March 18, 2003

SPRING has arrived! The bluebonnets are blooming everywhere, the misty rain prevails in the daily weather report (a happy occurrence for this West Texas gal), and trees are budding out in tiny, tight coils of new growth. It signifies hope to me, hope and renewal. It reminds me of my first days in Austin after the split, when I was a boiling pot of elation, giddy excitement, angst, rebellion and liberation! (Now, that's a brew!) Every now and then I see something--the view of fog lifting off the surface of Town Lake as I cross on Mo-Pac, or just the feel of sheets of humidity on my cheeks as I walk under dew-heavy tree branches--and it fills me with that same thrill of being where I belong, of identifying with my surroundings, with the city of my dreams. Literally. I dreamed for many years after we lived here in the early days of our marriage that I was once again walking Lamar in search of that weird little building where I had trained, of shopping in off-beat retro shops or of eating plate-monopolizing pancakes. In my dreams I saw through the moisture the quaint charm of back streets, lush and heavily treed, each containing, in my fantasy, people of infinite delight and intrigue. Living out in Circle C now, I am separated from the stimulus. But at odd moments, with a certain set of conditions, it rushes back to me and I'm awash in pride. I am an Austinite.

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