The view from there...

Do hawks ever have trouble seeing the forest for the trees? My point is that in order to gain perspective, you have to separate yourself from the vantage point in the middle of the problem. I find that the best way to do that is to physically separate myself. I'm not talking about splitting hairs or atoms--if that worked I would have separated myself from my thighs a long time ago! I'm talking about the weekend getaway.

My girlfriends and I have taken a few jaunts away and find ourselves often longing for another. And while it is very tricky to extricate ourselves from our dependents (both canine and human), it does all of us, including the dependents, a lot of good. Women are under a tremendous amount of pressure every day, to look "right", to act "right", to do the "right" things and to handle everything in the "right" way. When we go on our little trips, there is no right or wrong way. We have become comfortable enough with one another to espouse an "anything goes" attitude. Our weekend motto is "Whatever!" Shoppers shop, nappers nap, thinkers think, readers read...you get the picture.

We bring things to share, food, magazines, drinks--but what really matters on these escapades is what we do NOT bring--responsibilities, errands, expectations or the stuff of our every day lives.

Something about our girl weekends bonds us. Perhaps it is that being plopped simultaneously in a foreign environment puts us all on an equal footing which lends itself to intimacy...something that is sorely lacking in today's world. Perhaps it is the long hours of gabbing. Or possibly it is that we shed our "ought to"s and in revealing our true selves, find that we are more alike than we are different.

The shared experience is like a quirky movie--sometimes enjoyed even more in retrospect. As we return to our lives, we are enriched by having shared our commonality. Yes, the laundry has piled up, the voicemail and e-mail must be gone through, the shopping and cleaning await. But we are refreshed in spirit, and that's why those dependents see a lot more smiles when we return.